“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7
I’m going to get real here. I have often heard people talk of having a personal relationship with Jesus and I have a mixture of emotions: disbelief, envy, shame, and determination to have that for myself.
In my quest for that relationship, I have asked Jesus into my heart numerous times over a long period of time. I remember reading a devotional and asking God into my heart in our old house so that was over thirty years ago.
I was after a feeling or a thunderclap or something to confirm that I was accepted by God. I have often had answered prayer and felt God’s presence when I pray but I felt that was not enough.
I had always wanted to go to Israel and that part of my quest was to be rededicated to the Lord and experience more. I had hoped to have the sensation that I was craving. Well, no thunderclap, but I was happy. It felt right.
Once when I shared something with Pastor Bob, he explained that he called the inspirations I feel “inner promptings.” I have lots of those. I am inspired to write these words of encouragement. Frankly I didn’t really want to write this one for fear of being judged, but I felt God urging me to write it.
Last week when Pastor Jim talked about a pastor who had never asked Jesus into his heart, I knew that wasn’t me as I’ve asked numerous times. But I realized in that moment that I didn’t need to go forward. I felt at peace and confident that I am accepted by God as I am washed in the blood of Jesus. No more asking Jesus into my heart, He’s there. I have faith in Him.