"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from Your presence or take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of Your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me." Psalm 51:10-12
Have you read a Scripture over and over and over again but just kept on reading past it, as if it didn’t have significant impact for your life, at least at that moment? Then one day, God draws you to that specific verse, and it hits you like a ton of bricks?
This just happened to me the other day. Sometimes when I have trouble falling asleep, I try to think of as many Bible verses that I’ve memorized over the years. I know several by heart, but I’m not always so good with the references. One of the verses I thought about the other night was “Create in me a pure (or clean) heart, O God, and renew a steadfast (or right) spirit within me.” As I tried to recall the reference, I thought… hmmmm… I think it’s Psalm 51 something… maybe Psalm 51:10? I wasn’t sure and it was 2:00 in the morning so I wasn’t about to look it up since I was attempting to fall asleep!
Eventually I drifted off, and by morning, I completely forgot all about confirming the reference. As I was doing my devotions that morning (the YouVersion Online women’s life group at LPC, led by Peg Helland, (https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/13233/together/36599649/invitation?token=e0FZhnBR1xavfzbY43sjzw&source=share) one of the Scripture readings was Psalm 51. As I reached verse 10, aha! Yes, there it is… I was right. Okay, interesting… thank You Jesus. But that was about it. Then I read the two following verses, 11 & 12, which I had not previously memorized, “Do not cast me from Your presence or take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of Your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.” These verses hit me like a ton of bricks. Certainly the Lord put these verses right before me when I needed them most. Yes, I’ve read them before, likely many times before… but this time they really took hold, and I’ve since memorized them.
You see, I have a confession… I’ve been struggling the past couple of years and while I don’t doubt my faith, sometimes I feel like I’m going through the motions. I pray regularly, I do devotions every morning (almost), I go to church… and yet sometimes God feels far away. I’ve been praying that He would restore my first love for Him. I’ve prayed for that joy, that mountaintop “feeling” you have when you first believe and are transformed. Honestly, I haven’t been sure exactly how to pray for this. I’ve used different words, different approaches, but the request felt clumsy and un-refined. Still, I’ve prayed.
God literally poured these verses in my lap, the morning after Psalm 51 came to mind. I knew that He was speaking to me. When I heard Him so clearly, it was certainly not “going through the motions!” Hallelujah! This is the most concise, most accurate, and most powerful way I can pray for this issue this year. Lord Jesus! Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. Do not cast me from Your presence or take Your Holy Spirit from me.
Restore to me the joy of Your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me. This is my prayer for 2022.
If you’ve felt like you are going through the motions, or that God feels far… look harder. Don’t give up but keep praying, praising Him in all circumstances, and reading (and especially memorizing) Scripture. God is there… always.