"Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves." Philippians 2:3
We do it with our words, we use facial gestures, we put our hands on our hips, we raise our voices, we clench our fists, we roll our eyes, and often times we embarrass ourselves or the people we are near. Complaining - that's what we do sometimes - and it sure feels good.
Out West, a cowboy was driving down a dirt road, his dog riding in the back of the pickup truck, his faithful horse in the trailer behind. He failed to negotiate a curve and had a terrible accident. Sometime later, a highway patrol officer came on the scene. An animal lover, he saw the horse first. Realizing the serious nature of its injuries, he drew his service revolver and put the animal out of his misery. He walked around the accident and found the dog, also hurt critically. He couldn't bear to hear it whine in pain, so he ended the dog's suffering as well. Finally he located the cowboy--who suffered multiple fractures--off in the weeds. "Hey, are you okay?" the cop asked. The cowboy took one look at the smoking revolver in the trooper's hand and quickly replied, "Never felt better!"
When our daughters were growing up and it sounded like one of them was being whiny and complaining, I would say, "If you're complaining I can't hear you, but if you're explaining we'll figure it out.' Eventually this phrase was shortened to be "YOu complaining or explaining." Complaining is focussing on all the responsibility being other people's problem, while explaining is focussing on what I can do. Complaining has a focus on our perfection, while explaining shows a desire for things to be mended and helped.
Often we are a victim or it seems as though we are a victim. The situation is painful and it hurts.When we explain, we focus on a solution being made, but put punishment back toward the other person. I think of it this way - Jesus spent His efforts on helping us in our situation. "Explains" focusses on a desire for help. Here's a practical tip next time you feel like complaining. Ask yourself, "Will this really matter if it continues?" "Do I want this resolved or do I want pity?" and "What would be helpful for sharing my pain?"
